Ten days. That’s all. Ten days until I’m there.
It certainly feels like I’m moving-deciding to go to bed, then finding myself in the middle of yet another project. Sentimentality haunting me everywhere I go. It’s times like these that I’m scared to go to sleep because I know things will be different tomorrow-tomorrow, it will be nine days…
As if staying up will keep things from changing, as if not going to sleep will somehow stop time. I feel like I should be in a Doctor Who episode…
Change is hard-if you hadn’t noticed. Change is usually good, it makes us throw out old things that we no longer need and gain new things, learn new lessons, acquire cooler things that grow us. But it’s still hard. Who knows what will happen? Who knows what we will have to throw out? Yes, those things are old, and yes we no longer need them, but we love them, they helped us get through so much… Yet God knows exactly what is going to happen. And God is enough.
“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous! Do not tremble or be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” -Joshua 1:9 (NASB)
“‘Do not be afraid of them, For I am with you to deliver you,’ declares the Lord.” -Jeremiah 1:8 (NASB)
“He put a new song in my mouth, a song of praise to our God; Many will see and fear and will trust in the Lord.” -Psalm 40:4 (NASB)
“The Lord will command His lovingkindness in the daytime; And His song will be with me in the night, A prayer to the God of my life. . . Why are you in despair, O my soul? And why have you become distrurbed withing me? Hope in God, I shall yet praise Him, The help of my countenance and my God.” -Psalm 42:8, 11 (NASB)
“The Lord is my strength and my shield; My heart trusts in Him, and I am helped; Therefore my heart exults, And with my song I shall thank Him.” -Psalm 28:7 (NASB)
“But You, O Lord, are a shield about me, My glory and the One who lifts my head, I was crying to the Lord with my voice, And he answered me from His holy mountain. I lay down and slept, I awoke, for the Lord sustains me. . . Salvation belongs to the Lord; Your blessing be upon Your people!” -Psalm 3:3-5, 8
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart, And do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him And He will make your paths straight. Do not be wise in your own eyes; Fear the Lord and turn away from evil.” -Proverbs 3:5-7
What do I have to fear? Some would say, “plenty!” I don’t know what is going to happen, good or bad. But I know, I trust that God is with me, and if He is with me, I can get through anything.
So this is my after-midnight-I’m-freaking-out-and-reminding-myself-to-trust-God-post. Because I am scared.